How your intuition and trusting yourself can better your life: Reflections, exercises, and suggestions.
Because of its ephemeral nature, intuition is a difficult subject to write about. Intuition is both entirely unique to everyone, and entirely familiar. As such, I will be drawing mainly from my own understanding and experience to explain and demonstrate in this post. Intuition, no matter how it presents – a feeling, a vision, a dream, whispered words on the wind etc., is a form of knowing. Intuition is to know/feel something is true and believing that truth to the very core of your being – without any obvious evidence or obvious explanation as to why you know this. Some people call it our wild or animal instinct.
I didn’t fully come to trust my intuition until I was in my thirties, and even now I still have moments of doubt and fear. For a long time, I thought there had to be more certainty, more signs, and greater confirmation. I thought that I wasn’t good enough, I wasn’t worthy enough to be a witch, or that my ‘bad’ parts of myself had to, simply had to drown out any power or wisdom I had. I was simply too damaged. My negative self-talk could talk me out of anything, it could literally steal my ability to believe in myself. And this is why getting to know yourself is so important and why you will always be your biggest obstacle.
Doubts and fears can be wonderful tools for assessing a situation or an aspect of yourself, but it can become corrosive and damaging if it gets to the point that you are so critical that you can’t trust yourself at all.
Self-trust and intuition have both been regular themes in my work, but even more so lately. This may be due to the super blue blood moon in Leo. Leo is associated with the self, ego, and identity. Given that Chrion is moving through Pisces and is squared with the Moon, now is a good time to think about connecting with and healing your connection with yourself and your intuition; to peel the mists back from your truth.
This is much easier to say than do for many people. This is because there is only one person who is an expert in your intuition, and that is you. You will always be your greatest teacher when it comes to magick, intuition etc. Listening to mentors only offers so much if you aren’t willing to do the work.
On the surface, intuition is very easy to doubt or even ignore. It can be brushed away as nonsense, people can doubt their own power, or it can be labelled wishful thinking or psychological projection. There are thousands of ways to denounce intuition or find excuses not to trust it. I think it is always important to consider these possibilities when dealing with intuition, critical thinking doesn’t get side-stepped just because you’re leaning into your instincts. But letting critical thought squash your intuition entirely doesn’t help either.
There are some solid psychological explanations for intuition. One is that all the evidence needed to come to the conclusion your intuition is telling you is there in front of you; you just haven’t consciously processed it, yet. Another explanation is that a memory of a similar event is blurring with your current circumstance and your mind is racing ahead to solve the problem, extrapolating from the past. There is just as much evidence for intuition being a projection of emotion. However, overall, science doesn’t have a complete answer for what intuition is or how it works.
There are numerous stories of people listening to their intuition, no matter how crazy it seemed, and it ended up saving their life or someone else’s. In the end, it doesn’t matter how or why intuition manifests, what matters is how you decide you want to work with it.
As a tarot reader my work often requires me to assess and either confirm or denounce people’s intuitions. The client’s intuition is hardly ever wrong. The question really becomes: why can’t the client trust themselves? While it makes sense to occasionally seek someone out to discuss and confirm your own gut feelings, especially when it comes to big issues or decisions that you know your emotions and desires could cloud, there are some people that never trust themselves or their intuition and rely solely on external reinforcement. There are times in our lives where it can be hard to trust ourselves, but when it is a constant state of being, it can lead to feelings of powerlessness and dependency.
While intuition is unique to everyone overall, it is still rare that you will get an intuition that you feel like you can trust 100% without any doubt or fear. There are no big thunderbolts or signs in the sky announcing the truth. You can have a solid knowing in your gut and still doubt it for lack of evidence, or because you don’t want to believe it. Sometimes intuition can be an instant and certain knowing, but more often than not, intuition is a subtle and soft experience. That is why it is so important to know how to be silent, listen and know yourself.
Some people also don’t believe they are capable of intuition. Some people don’t believe they are worthy of it. But that isn’t how intuition works. Everyone has the power of intuition. If you want more powerful intuition you need to work it, just like you would work any other muscle to make it bigger and stronger. It is very much a case of use it or lose it. The more you can listen to your intuition and trust in it, the more confident you’ll become overall. You’ll get to know what your intuition feels like and how it presents. You may even start to see patterns you hadn’t noticed before. Maybe there is something similar about the paths your intuition is leading you down. Does your intuition know something you don’t? What is it looking for? How conscious can you become of your life journey and fate? In getting to know the nature of your intuition you’ll slowly develop more and more trust in it. You’ll get to know the feel of it and thus be more aware of when fear, doubt, or projection playing a role. You may also find that you are more at peace when life gets chaotic. You will also see that sometimes failure is necessary for growth, and that sometimes your intuition will guide you towards failure – and that is okay. Growth, wisdom, love, self-love, evolution, spirituality, magick etc., are not all about winning and success, they are about learning, experience, joy, compassion, spirit, truth and deep awareness. Sometimes failure is the doorway to these things. Listening to your intuition can help you deal with loss and failure.
If the thought of trusting in this unknown and unseen force scares you, start small. You can make notes of your hunches and intuitions without taking action. Once you take note, just watch how it pans out. You can then start making small steps towards trusting it. A really good way to start working with intuition is when you are spell casting.
Spell casting is like art, there are instructions but in the end you need to feel your way through it to get the effect you want. Next time you have a spell to cast consider reading the ritual and getting the materials, then sitting there and meditating with them, feel into the ritual and the materials. Are there any adjustments you can make that would increase the power of the spell for you and tailor it more specifically to your needs? You can try experimenting with combining different materials to see what feels right to you. You may find the original instructions and materials feel right for you, or you might find you want to replace some or all of the ingredients. If you are concerned about the dangers of experimenting in magick – don’t be. Realistically, this is a whole other post about how magick is meant to be fun and experimental – up to a certain level (for want of a better term.) But if you are nervous about experimenting with magick, think about asking a guide or one of the Gods/Goddess of learning and magick to protect you.
When I try experiments like the one above, my intuition or, my sense of ‘knowing’ is similar to that sense of coming home after a long day and slipping into some comfy clothes. It just feels ‘right’. It feels like there is a smooth connection between myself and the world, like jig saw puzzle falling into place. I tend to find that following my intuition always feels like this, even when dealing with dark issues or problems. Even if my intuition is telling me something I don’t want, I still feel more at peace following it than trying to fight it. Ignoring or fighting from my intuition can leave me feeling uncomfortable and even anxious. I can only assume this is because it means when I follow my intuition I am living my truth and allowing my higher-self and spirit to guide me. I am trusting in myself. I feel strong. That is not to say I don’t doubt my intuition from time to time, or that following my intuition always works out perfectly. But regardless of the outcome, when I listen to and trust my intuition I know that I am still working on communicating with and trusting myself. This is huge for anyone – witch or not.
Knowing yourself and developing a healthy and trusted inner voice and knowing is such a powerful skill and important self-care mechanism. Knowing and trusting yourself helps you stay grounded and clear in times of so surprise and distress. Self-talk really does impact on our sense of self. Avoiding negative self-talk and knowing what your truth feels like is vital. Knowing yourself isn’t just a magickal creed, but also a principle of science, philosophy, and the humanities.
For some people, just starting this inner conversation and journey with themselves is a huge step. I worked with one client to help her develop trust in her (very capable!) psychic abilities. One of the things we worked on together was an intuition diary. She would make note of what gut feelings/intuitions/knowings/hunches/dreams she had, and then any doubts or feelings she had about them. Then she simply observed what happened. Arguably, observing intuition can still have an impact on the outcome, but that isn’t really the point. The point of this exercise is to develop your inner voice, to get to know it, and over time trust your intuition and yourself. This means if you ever do need to make a split minute decision, if you get a ‘bad vibe’, or you’re wanting to experiment more with magick, you’ll know your inner voice and how to work with it in a grounded, clear and healthy way. This will also make your spellcraft more potent – intention is everything.
Often in conjunction with a lack of self-trust is a lack of self-worth or self-belief. In my view everyone is worthy. We all have the capacity to be witches with strong intuitive powers. While it is true some people are born with more magick than others, it is just like art. Natural talent only makes up 1% of being a witch, any form of magick, or having strong intuition. The rest of the 99% is work. We are all equal, we are all capable, we all have a magical, powerful, intuitive voice that we can develop and trust if we want to. That doesn’t mean you have to stop reaching out for confirmation and advice, but your most reliable and powerful compass to the life you want and the person you want to be is you.
To be clear, I am not denouncing critical thought or the importance of compassion for others, but developing your inner voice, intuition, and self-trust are just as vital life skills, but are often overlooked or misunderstood.
On the 31st there will be a hugely significant astrological event. The Full Moon in Leo wont only be a Super Blood Moon but also a Blue Moon… that will also fall under a full Luna eclipse.
Full Moons are when the Moon is at its peak power of shadowy silver feminine magick; a perfect time for spellwork, petitioning and connecting with gods, goddesses, guides, totems, etc. Many witches use the magick of the Full Moon for protection, blessings, love-magick, wayseeing, breaking through obstacles, charging spell-works and charms, and for making Moon Water. The Full Moon is potent, full of energy and light, pregnant with possibilities and good fortune, ready to favour wishes and fuel dreams. A Super Blood Moon is an amplification of this already bombastically beautiful energy. Add a Blue Moon (the second Full Moon inside a single calendar month,) and you are adding yet another magickal boost to the equation. Blue Moons considered to be an extra potent magickal event. The aspect of ‘Blue’ making it that much easier to communicate and connect on a psychic level this night. It can be emotionally chaotic but the tarot spread and rituals below should help with this energy.
The Full Moon will be in Leo. As such there will be a focus on; love, ego, loyalty, stubbornness, heart, and spirit. Given that this Blue Blood Fire Moon will set the tone for the next six months, and given the themes that have been coming up in my readings, it felt vital that this month’s tarot spread focused on trusting the self, especially when it comes to intuition.
People often joke about Leos being vain and self-centred. I should know, I am a Leo through and through. However, one of the most important things you can work towards in life is knowing thyself and knowing when your intuition is speaking either through visions, words, feelings, dreams etc. However, this is easier said than done.
Intuition works differently for everyone and it is not uncommon to struggle to learn to trust your intuition and maintain that trust. It is so easy to doubt and question your intuition, especially if you are feeling low. And when starting out, it is so easy to get caught up in asking: “Is that the ‘knowing’? Is my intuition really picking up on it? Or, am I just projecting my hopes/fears? Is it all just in my mind?” Don’t get me wrong, it is important to question your intuition in order to decide on whether it is projection or real. But don’t get stuck on this point. This takes practice. And once you’ve mastered it, you’ll still fuck up once in a while.
When people doubt their intuition because it could all just be in their mind, I respond with: of course it is in your mind. We are the physical vessels for spirit and consciousness. Humans are how the universe experiences itself. Every intuition we have is processed through our bodies. We are physical beings. That is why it is important to try and look after your body, it is much easier to communicate with spirit through a healthy medium/body. But questioning your intuition and doubting yourself to the point where you either paralyze yourself, or where you never trust yourself, or where those feelings eventually and completely undermine you and your power, is perhaps the most corrosive thing you can do. This is the number one way to mute your personal power and magick.
Your intuition is one of your greatest powers. There are numerous cases of people listening to their intuition about a situation or a person, and it saving their lives. Sometimes you just know, 100%, without a single doubt and without a single trace of evidence… you know that not everything is how it seems.
Relegating this intuitive knowing to a falsehood, or relegating yourself to believe you can’t trust your own gut disrespects yourself and this power. It minimizes your magick and personal power. The Blue Blood Fire Spread and rituals will help you increase trust in your intuition and yourself. If you already have significant trust, they will help you strengthen and clear your intuition.
Given that this Blue Blood Fire Moon will set the tone of the next six months including all the achievements and new beginnings you can look forward to, now is the perfect time to re-establish that self-trust and intuition. The Super Moon and the Blue Moon are catalysts for new bright, new, fortunate beginnings. Let them light you up and fill you full of magick.
Blue Moons used to be called ‘Betrayer’ Moons, they were considered to go against the laws of nature. But time and understanding has flipped that magick round. Betrayer Moons are now Blue Moons and considered to bring great fortune, magick, and success. Apply this Blue Moon’s magick of growth and change to your intuition.
Blue Blood Fire Moon
Card 1: This is your intuition.
Card 2: This is you.
Card 3: What’s blocking your intuition?
Card 4: What is holding you back from trusting yourself?
Cards 5-7: What can you do to unblock your intuition and trust yourself more?
Cards 8-10: What can you do to strengthen your intuition?
Card 11: Overall, how will this change your sense of self?
Card 12: What will be the flow on effects of trusting your intuition?
Card 13: What do you need to be aware of/potential dangers?
Card 14: What is the greatest strength of your intuition?
Card 15: Do the flames of spirit have anything more to share?
Blue Blood Fire Ritual: Cutting the binds of fear
Luna eclipses also bring endings. Now is time to stop being afraid of yourself. Use the wild of the blue, the fierceness of the fire, and the magick of the moon to free yourself from doubt.
Best done at the time of the actual eclipse if you can.
Cast your circle.
Have a fire proof container and matches.
Anoint your wrists, heart, and forehead with rose oil.
Wrap silver ribbon around waist while visualising or feeling into what it is like when you can’t trust your intuition. You can use a specific incident if you like.
With your hands over your heart, repeat the following: “I love and trust myself and my intuition completely. I love and trust myself and my intuition completely. I love and trust myself and my intuition completely. I ask the Moon to aid me in casting out any fears I have about communicating with, and trusting myself and my intuition. I now cut the binds of these fears. (Cut the ribbon and toss it in the fire.) I am now free. The the first step to claiming my freedom to trust myself and intuition is:”…..
Trust whatever you see, hear or feel next, even if it is juggling bunny rabbits.
Put out the fire.
Exit the circle.
Work towards taking that first step that you saw in your meditation.
Blue Blood Fire Ritual-Meditation: Strengthening intuition
Luna eclipses also bring more emotion and magick. These emotions can either cloud or strengthen intuition. The following exercise will help you cleanse and then meditate on strengthening your intuition.
After the cutting, if you have the energy, spend some more time quietly meditating and moon-bathing.
Imagine you are sitting at a piano. The top is open. You can see all the wires. Each wire has a vibration of emotion or spirit connected to it. Watch as they start to vibrate. Where do you feel each wire’s vibration in your body? What does it tell you? How can you separate it from the other wires? What does it feel like? What does it sound like? What does it look like compared to the other strings? Do this with every string and then, without hesitation, grab the string you feel drawn to and believe to be the truest.
Reflect on all the reasons why you chose that string and what the message of that string is.
If you start to get lost in your meditation, great! The power of meditation is constantly adjusting your focus to come back to what you want to work on.
If it is really murky and hard: keep trying and get as creative as possible to shift the mists and draw things into clarity.
Warning: Educational purposes only. Never consume, or any in other way become intoxicated by, Datura.
My dreams are still continuing the same theme of home and loss, but over the last few nights there has been a shift. A woman has appeared at some point in all of my dreams and offered me flowers. She was old, robed in lavender, and carried a white wicker basket full of blooms. I was wary, I am always wary of taking things from strangers in dreams. I was also wary because I couldn’t identify the flowers, which turned out to be a very wise precaution. Last night, in my dream, it became clear that the woman was Lady Datura and she was offering me an armful of Angel Trumpets (Brugmansia.)
I love baneful herbs and flowers, Angel Trumpets in particular. However, there is a time and a place.
Angel Trumpets are highly toxic and should not be handled. However, it has proven useful for both Western Medicine, and continues to be a vital ally for medicine men and women across the world. It is a valuable hex breaker, hex caster, and dream-flying ally. It is known for passion, power, prophesy, protection, and love magick.
But this plant is not only dangerous because it is toxic, but because of the doors it can open. Around the world, Angel Trumpets (along with most other Datura plants) are recognized as manifestations of Lady Datura. Lady Datura is not a spirit to be played with. She must be respected and honoured if you want to avoid getting your ass kicked across several dimensions.
I have used flying ointment once. To say that it was intense was an understatement. But despite some of the bumpier parts, Lady Datura did help me understand my dream-magick in a different way. Given that that was the reason for my flight, I felt very blessed and lucky indeed that Lady Datura heard and answered my petitions.
So, when I went for a walk this morning and came across an Angel Trumpet tree that I had never seen before, I knew it was time to start thinking and writing about her and the Baneful Path again.
Lady Datura has a wicked reputation. People either love her or hate her. She is a temptress; she is as wise as she is dangerous. Disrespect her and you can expect to die or go terminally insane. Some people consider her crazy, I prefer to consider her chaotic – things have to be rearranged in order to create doorways that were never there before. But if you understand and respect Lady Datura, she can be a powerful dream ally, helping you to see further and understand better. She can attract and repel the dead at will. She is also known for opening the gates of prophecy. Riding with her, all walls and boundaries thin and everything is possible. The power of life and death rests in your hands and your eyes now see all.
But it is important to be aware of her darker side. She is a poison. In the wrong dose she will kill you or send you insane. Datura is often used in Voodoo for the process of making human zombies. Governments have also made use of Datura in this way because its powder is tasteless and odorless.
Lady Datura is a powerfully magical double edged sword of chaos, and given one of her chemical ingredients is Atropine (both a tropane alkaloid and is derived from the name Atropos, one of the Moirai/Fates who is the one severs the life thread. This is why it is not uncommon to find people who have messed with Datura and who don’t know what they are doing covered in cuts. The need to sever can consume a person under the influence of Datura.
There is so much I could write on Lady Datura. The first and last thing I always warn though is
- don’t go near the plants unless you know exactly what you are doing because every part of the plant is toxic,
- and b) Don’t invoke or be tempted by Lady Datura until you’ve done your research to know how to work with her as safely as possible. But in the end, Lady Datura can never be fully trusted. But for me, that is part of what I love about working with her.
Lady Datura, in my view, carries, understands, and is deep shadow magick, nature magick, and dream magick. I don’t agree with the label of ‘evil’ that she is often cast with, but she does have the capacity and temperament to do both very, very good things, and very, very bad things. But sometimes we need the bad, sometimes the cure to the poison is the poison.
I am planning on flying with her again soon, but not until I have had a few good chats with her in my dreams to see what she wants. Lady Datura will always have her own hidden agenda.
Today I pulled some cards to connect with Lady Datura to see if she had any wisdom to share with my followers. The cards that came forward were the Judgement, Moon, The High Priestess, Death, The Fountain, and the Devil. This was a very ‘heavy’ reading and it almost felt like there was another hand guiding my hand to pick up the cards; a cool fluid sensation flooding my palms and fingers.
Words as spoken by the cards themselves:
A calling of magick from unknown places of dark and decay. Where things fall apart and leave the bones that cast long spells and wind even longer hexes. Lady Datura is here. Lady Datura is here. Death is her magick. Magick is her lure. Blessed are the flowers that bleed from her hair. She has poison on her lips and swords for hands. She wants to cut you open, she wants to cut the whole world open to see it all, the horror and the beauty and the knowing. She comes with illusion to end illusion. The art of turning back on one’s self to recreate, to understand, to die, and to be born. Life is a transient state; truth is not. Be careful of the door you choose, she can cut a hole in any web, in any fabric made of sky and dreams, and guide you through. But why would you step? Why would you follow? Do you trust her? Do you understand? Are you seeking? Or, is ego going to pull you down the spiral of Lady Datura’s hips and leave you ripe for her hungry succubus cunt? The cure to the poison is the poison. The baneful path unfolds, waiting with its many treasures and traps. Do you know thyself? Do you know thyself? Lady Datura knows you, and isn’t that a deliciously dangerous and wonderful thing. Can you feel her plucking on your web, playing and calling? There’s a warning in that hidden tune that rumbles through your blood like a storm ready to break: don’t be seduced by power, don’t be seduced by the dark, rather stand strong in the truth of yourself and seek understanding from the inside out. Lady Datura’s embrace is the void of the moon and her words the sounding of the divine. She is a terrible beauty that will haunt you in your dreams. Ghost Queen, Lady Datura, Momoy, Ta:gamih, Grandmother, Mephistophina, Water Dreamer, Storm Rider, Mother of Air, Moon Flower, Moon Mother, Coyote dreamer, Tsimonmana, A’neglakya… We are listening with open hearts, whisper your wisdom, and protect us from the glitch in the web, hold us back from the absence of madness so that prophesy and truth may be spoken freely.
I was due to write up some profound and deep Solstice post that would hopefully reach out to my followers and touch the hearts of those who needed it. But that ain’t gonna happen. And that is okay. I try to be authentic in sharing my journey as a witch because it’s not all candles and mead and crystals. Sometimes it just sucks.
My Solstice was rough. I designed a tough-love spread for looking at the balance of light and dark, and the Universe decided to give me a taste of my own medicine. Be careful what you wish for, kids!
It has been a heavy three days of dreamwalking and nightmares, each one poignant in their own way, and each one leaving me with a ‘dream hangover’. I define dream hangovers as that feeling you have when the emotion from your dream follows you into the day, clouding your mind and heart. This feeling often hovers until I process the meaning of the dream. The themes of these dreams have been ‘home’, or more correctly, Hiraeth: a homesickness for a home you can’t return to, or never was. My last three days have pretty much consisted of me curled up on the couch with coffee, candles, pets, while I read and wrote, hoping the back of my mind would process the dreams. Exciting, huh?
This perplexed me somewhat. ‘Home’ is a major issue for me. I thought I had this issue in the bag. Why has it come back at the Solstice? The Sun’s power is dying, is my home in the shadows? Is my home the dark?
For a long time, I have felt unsettled. I am a country girl living in the city. All I ever wanted was to return to my mountain and my forest (the Dandenong Ranges in Victoria.) The ache in my chest hung heavy every day. If I walked down to the beach I could see the tip of my mountain from across the other side of the city, but this just made the distance hurt even more. I would often go and visit my mountain. It was the only time I felt grounded, the only time I felt ‘home’. Whenever I visited there and my car first started to climb the mountain, my skin would tingle and my lungs expand to soak in the green, the ozone, and the energy. My system came to a joyous and sensual place of rest.
When I was a child I has a Mother Tree that I used to go and hide in when my family or the ghosts got too much. Even as an adult, I would go back and visit her and make a burrow for myself at her base and curl up there, resting and meditating for hours. Sometimes I would even fall asleep, spending the day curled up in her roots. So as you can imagine, the shift from living with her, to living 1.5 hours’ drive away was hard. Very hard. Painful, even. The Mountain has claimed me as its own as much as I have claimed it. It has saved my life and sanity countless times. However, trying to explain that to people, especially my loved ones has always been a struggle. For most people I know family is home. That is not the case for me. My heartbreaks for a mountain.
But in the last year or so I have grown and come to see that home is more something you carry inside you. My trip to America/Canada this year cemented it. There are places and people in the United States and Canada that bring me the same sense of safety, healing, groundedness and joy that Mother Tree does. Both my best friend and my girlfriend/muse live in the United States. Vancouver as a whole is a Mother Tree to me. So, my heart is very much in multiple places: Australia, Canada and the USA. As such, my sense of home has been evolving.
Why is home so important to me? I think it is important to everyone but I am an extreme introvert. I can appear to be extroverted in public, but all that energy I expend will take me days to recoup, alone, in my den. I am a Lion who needs her den. I need to know there is at least one place on this earth I can return to and feel safe, and feel like I have a right to exist. I need a place of sanctuary I know I can hide in… or else I go a bit nuts.
The idea of creating a sense of ‘home’ within myself is very recent development, very unexpected, but very welcomed. The ache for my mountain and Vancouver will always be there, but learning to carry that grief, and the grief of missing my muse who is on the other side of the globe, with abler hands and lightly would be a blessing.
But why is this coming up at Litha? Is it because I am also tied closely to the Northern Hemisphere and some of the Yule energy flowed through my dreams? All I know is that in my dreams Mother Tree was killed, my childhood home destroyed, and my friends withdrawn. I had to gather what I could and make a run for it. I had to harvest the bare minimum I needed to feel at home, throw it in a car and run.
I was my only home, along with my pets.
In 2018 I am returning to the United States, Canada, and France. My itinerary will largely be determined by going to visit friends. I have already come to an agreement with my husband and girlfriend that I will spend half the year in Australia and half of the year in the United States. So, perhaps my dream was about harvesting what I need to create a sense of home within so I can navigate this new and very privileged globetrotting life with ease, even if it won’t be a long life.
Maybe it is time to become my own Mother Tree. But as most seeds sprout in the dark, I will need to descend into the shadows to undergo this transformation. And it terrifies me. I don’t know why, but it does.
And so this, this is the work of being a witch. Messages don’t always come through easily or nicely. Connections with the divine are not always pleasant. Sometimes it simply hurts. But I know that if I don’t follow through on this work and descend to tend to my roots, the upcoming Winter of the soul will be very bleak. I won’t have the energy I need to serve my clients, let alone care for myself and those I love.
This really isn’t a profund Solstice blog post talking about the new astrological energies and the shift in season and what you can do to harness and work with these energies to manifest a bright future, but it is my blog post. This is my experience of the solstice and I wanted to share it with you. Why? Because my online community means the world to me and sometimes I actually want to share with you all, just like I would a good friend. And maybe, just maybe, something in my little Solstice journey might resonate with someone else.
Today’s reading is a big reading because it is covering an important and highly personal topic: the balance of light and dark in the self.
I don’t like the terms ‘light’ and ‘dark’, I think they are simplistic, have incorrect connotations, and are somewhat misnomers. I certainly don’t believe in ‘white’ and ‘black’ witches However, they are the easiest way to discuss the topics at hand today.
Both Campbell and Jung referred to the light and dark as necessary halves of a whole. The dark was the hidden, the shamed, and the unacknowledged – and often the source of growth and will. Meanwhile, the light was both the soul and the self we let shine in the word.
The Wheel of the Year sees the balance of light and dark in much the same way, both are necessary for growth. Light and dark cannot exist without the other. However, witches tend to see the dark as more fertile and magical than Campbell and Jung, while the light also has more direct magickal connotations.
We all know what we speak of when we speak of light and dark, and it’s not as simple as good or bad – there is no value differentiation. The light and dark are necessary essences and energies that move within and around us, and right now we are at peak light and peak dark. It is a potent time for magick and inner-work.
Although light/dark and Litha/Yule are opposites, they are also one in the same, one King dies so another can take his place. The balance of light shifts. Growth changes direction. Some are left behind, some move on. Gratitude blooms and kin feel the beat of connection and love heavy in their chest. Yule is the longest night and marks the slow return of the light. Litha is the longest day and marks the slow return of the dark. We may be on opposite sides but we are all riding the same wheel of life, death, and everything in between.
We are currently sitting under the peak power of the God and Goddess. The fae are dancing and whispering, and the fires are burning with prophecy and wisdom. As the wheel turns and change crawls over the land, gifts of magick and growth linger in the air. The time is ripe for divination.
Whether you are in the North and welcoming the light, or in the South and welcoming the dark, this tarot spread and fire divination will help you flow with the change and come to a much deeper understanding of yourself and those around you. This wisdom will help you direct your energy wisely for the coming year and help those around you in the best way possible. However, it is a big spread and asks some rough questions. I have found the best way to draw this spread is by lighting a fire, shifting into a meditative space, drawing the cards quickly and on instinct, glancing over them and allowing your soul to absorb the messages, and then turn your attention to the fire and sit; just sit. Let the information percolate in your belly like a cauldron of magick, wisdom will rise as you let the glow of the fire bathe, comfort, bless, and reflect you.
The Dark Fire Tarot (for both Yule and Litha.)
- What is the source of your light?
- What is the source of your dark?
- How is the light here to help you?
- How is the dark here to help you?
- How can you healthily hold and store the light?
- How can you healthily hold and store the dark?
- How is the health of your light?
- How is the health of your dark?
- How can you nurture your light?
- How can you nurture your dark?
- How can the light help you grow?
- What seeds lie in the dark?
- What is the monster in your light?
- What is the monster in your dark?
- What is the hero in your light?
- What is the hero in your dark?
- Are you more drawn to the light or the dark?
- Do people see you as more light or dark?
- Are you actually more light or dark?
- How does your darkness connect to the darkness in others?
- How does your light connect to the light in others?
- How can the dark protect you?
- How can the light protect you?
- How can you best balance your inner light and dark?
- How can you best balance the light and dark around you?
- How can you bring the light and dark together to make yourself feel more whole?
Take the usual precautions with your candle or small fire and ensure no-one gets hurt and no-one’s house burns down. Never leave the fire alone. This is a holy fire.
When you turn to the flames let yourself sink into meditation. Then, burn an offering, something small, something that is important to you. This can be something personal, or something simple like a grain of wheat to symbolize your food. I will be burning a pomegranate seed I have been preparing for this night. Generally, the more heart that is in your gift to the flames, the more the flames will show you.
Be patient. Let your mind wander as you watch the flames dance. Trust what you see. Do. Not. Second. Guess. Like the God and Goddess, you are in your full power now, own it. Write down what you see and reflect on the tarot spread. Pay close attention to your dreams. Offer the ash of your ceremony back to the soil. Take time. Process.
New Year’s Magick Bundles.
Let’s face it, 2017 has been a bit of a bitch. While there has been both wonderful and less-wonderful things, the theme of my readings lately is one of people trying to stay positive as they step into the New Year, but struggling to hold onto that hope. So, as a gift to my followers and clients I am offering four gift packs at a heavily discounted price. (10% of the proceeds will go towards animal charities – more to be explained in the next blog post.)
These bundles can either be bought as gifts for yourself or someone else. They are limited to four; Earth, Wind, Fire, and Water.
The Witch’s New year is technically Samhain. However, in paying close attention to the energy of the moment, it is fairly clear many people are feeling the flow of new in conjunction with the Gregorian calendar.
Each bundle comes with a:
- New Year’s tarot deck,
- a one-hour telephone tarot reading,
- New Year’s white sage smudge stick,
- An anointed New Year’s candle,
- worry dolls,
- personally tailored spell jar,
- and bag of three charged crystals (Jade, Lilac Obsidian, and Malachite.)
Each reading is based around a theme however, should you decide your reading needs to be about something different we can work together to adjust it as needed. The candles and crystals won’t be charged until you have had your reading, so these can also be tailored to your needs. The spell jars will also be made according to what you feel you need coming into the new year.
The Earth Pack.
The Soulcards. For the Artist. As we move into 2018 let’s explore your relationship with your muse and ignite the fire of inspiration. In this reading we will explore the connection between your creativity and the divine. I will help you break down any blocks and clear the way for action. Together we will uncover how to connect to and nurture your muse, and make this connection manifest easily and lusciously in your life. Whether you are wanting to start creating, are creating for yourself, or have art as your business, this reading will help plant seeds of creation, inspiration, rejuvenation, energy, and joy. Get close and sensual with your muse.
The Fire Pack.
Dreams of Gaia. For the soul-seeker in you. This reading will help your connection with spirit and your divine self. As the light opens messages will be conveyed from the highest realm to help light the way through the year ahead. In this reading alone I will make space to connect with ancient elders, otherworldly totems (dragons and fae included) and in some cases, other worlds. Readings with this deck tend to be profound archetypal and alchemical journeys, but always loving. If you feel like seeing what the year ahead holds for you across the realms and obtain a higher perspective on where your life is headed, this is the reading for you. It will help you discover where the soul and heart fires burn for you in the year ahead, thus helping you navigate towards the path of most love and joy.
The Water Pack.
The Mystic Dreamer Tarot. This reading is for the witch in you, aiding you to get in touch with your intuition, higher self, and deepest magick. Start your year off by diving deep and retrieving the power and magick that awaits for you in the shadows and in the hands of the Goddess. Together we can connect and talk to the great feminine and explore ways in which to strengthen yourself, your magick, and personal power so that you can manifest the year you want.
The Air Pack.
The Raven Deck. This reading is for the Valkyrie in you. As part of this reading I will offer a distance healing to help align your mind, body and spirit for the new year so you can charge ahead at full power. The reading itself will work towards helping you expand your self-awareness so you can live with the upmost authenticity. This will include clearing and opening your channels so you can connect deeply with yourself and the world around. This will help you be in harmony with nature and the dimensions beyond. Such harmony will also enable you to hear and understand the heartbeat of the Universe and start deciphering the great mysteries; ravens have always been the totem of intelligence, wisdom, art, and expert communication. Ravens are also known as the light bringers; we will work together in this reading to bringing light to any area of life that is still in shadow. As such, this reading will help you fly into the year with strength, joy, and truth.
I have had some rough readings lately. Some people are loving the festive season – others? Not so much. So, today I pulled a card to guide us through the increasing pressure of the festive season. Some people thrive on this energy, others are agitated by it, some are even crushed by it. It is the time of year when most people commit suicide. Although I don’t celebrate Christmas, the Litha Solstice occurs on the 21st of December and this comes with equally big waves of bright solar energy. Again, some people love this energy, others like myself would rather hide under the bed, but I have been forcing myself to get a good dose of Sun daily and much to my disgust, it helps my mood and energy levels immensely. I have a strange relationship with solar energy. As a Leo with five planets in Leo and an Aries moon, I don’t need the extra fire!
While the Wheel speaks to fortune favouring you at the moment, it also indicates that external influences are likely to be pushing in on you for good or bad. As such. It is perhaps an unsurprising card to pull at this time of year. The chaos of the festivities seems to sweep just about everyone up in one way or another.
As with any major celebration or festival, a lot of memories (good and bad) come to the surface, traditions are imposed, and a spotlight is put on your life leaving you to examine where you are and what you are doing – for better or worse. People put their best face on social media and often spend way beyond their means to fill a hole that despite their beliefs, can’t be filled with money.
I am not denying that this can be a beautiful time of year. Just like anything, a relationship, a social event, life – it is as beautiful as you make it. (Disasters aside.) Christmas, although grotesquely materialistic, is still a lovely celebration of life and love with other people, people you love, and people who love you. It is also a celebration of faith. I don’t follow this faith but the reality of Christmas and how it impacts us all can’t be denied.
However, Christmas is also a time of year when if you don’t have people in your life, or if you are not in a good place, the negative can be compounded by societies influx of messages pushing you to BE HAPPY, BUY ALL THE THINGS, EAT ALL THE THINGS, LOVE ALL THE PEOPLE etc.
The Wheel, when it appears, reminds us that at this very moment fate and luck are on our side. It reminds us to hold on to our hopes and dreams, even if things appear bleak and you have lost faith, the Universe has your back. That energy that might be wearing you down also has the capacity to help you stand and stride forward if you can find a way to work with it. Harness the energy of this season for yourself to a) get through and b) have the energy to enjoy sharing and celebrating with those you love.
The Wheel is a card that demands action – it is not a card that encourages sitting still. However, in my view, given the pressures of this season simply surviving with your hopes and dreams intact is a major success. And if you need help surviving this season, reach out. Fate and luck are on your side. Reach out for help and a hand will appear. I promise you. This is also the season of ‘giving and generosity’, not everyone has been consumed by greed and stress, I promise you. Help is there.
Also, if you can, look around and find a moment every day to seek out something to be thankful for; something just for you. A little secret joy to catch and keep in your back pocket to help keep you going. Grasp that golden moment and hold it close to your chest and let the warmth of gratitude and hope fill you as you push through the surges of energy this season. It may be as simple as a good cup of tea, or going to a Christmas party and finding you actually enjoyed yourself. Remember – if you take risks at the moment, luck and fate are on your side. So whether you stay home or venture out, you are supported.
The rule of the Universe is the constancy of change. The Wheel of Fortune is favouring you at the moment, take risks and they will pay off, work towards a goal and you will be successful, dream and you will fly, strive to survive and you will. Part of the reason I am encouraging you to find moments of joy and let them nourish you is because the Wheel always turns. Always. Good and bad come in waves. Taking time to acknowledge the good while it is being offered will help you through the darker times. That is not to say dark times are coming, but change is definitely coming – it always does. Things won’t always be the way they are now. What can you do right now to shape your future to match your dreams? Even if it is one, small thing? Gift that to yourself. No matter how much luck you have on your side, happiness and love take work.
Today’s Odin Rune Spread: Wunjo (reversed and converse.)
Happiness hidden and inverted. Not the nicest way to start the day but definitely a theme that has been coming up in my readings and increasing as we head into the festive season.
Society has always pushed a strong focus on ‘happiness’. We all have to be happy and if you’re not happy, you’re a failure. Or, if you’re not happy you have to have a damn good reason why not. Never mind that occasional sadness is a normal part of the human experience.
It probably hasn’t passed you by that the world is in a bit of turmoil at the moment, there is a lot of fear and uncertainty. Along with that I have seen a lot of people working hard to stay positive and lift others up – in essence a lot of people with big hearts and good intentions running themselves into the ground with a tight grin on their face.. Some people are able to manage this while staying grounded and informed, others I have watched slowly separate from reality getting lost to fantasy.
Wunjo is not only associated with joy, luck, relationships and but also wishes and dreams. With it being reversed and conversed I can only think of the many people I have read for and spoken to lately who are fighting so hard to be ‘happy’ and fulfil all the ‘shoulds’ of their lives that they have stepped into creating and living a fantasy, a self-constructed trap in which they are trying to build a sense of happiness and convince themselves it is real.
This constructed happiness that they are lost in may take the form of a relationship, a friendship, a foolhardy venture, elaborate plans you know deep down you have little to no intention on following through. Or at its worst: addiction.
I am the last person to tell you to stop dreaming and wishing, but even dreaming has it dangers. They can deliver false happiness that demand all your energy to maintain the illusion while blocking personal growth and any gifts of true happiness from the Universe.
In short, is your happiness authentic or are you manufacturing something ‘like’ happiness because you think you should, because you are hiding from other emotions, or because you don’t trust the Universe to deliver anymore?
If you can relate to this, find someone who can hold space for you and talk.
If you know someone who you can relate this to, create and hold space for them offering a safe place to just be.
Sometimes all you need to do is breathe, whether is it through tears or a smile, that is your victory: breathing.
Here at Weaver Tarot we will be slowly introducing Pearl Whitecrow’s (Arts Of The Alchemists) jewellery. Pearl doesn’t just work as a tarot reader and rootworker, she is also a jeweller, sculptor, painter… general artist extraordinaire – with a witchy twist. Pearl’s art is both technically brilliant and spiritually powerful. I know because I own quite a few pieces of her work, including the sister piece to this Talisman.
This particular talisman is designed and crafted to both open up your intuitive awareness and strengthen your psychic powers whilst also protecting you, ensuring you are safe as you extend your gifts. She’ll wrap you in the colours of the Aurora Borealis, shielding you from chaos and darkness while encouraging to speak your truth. She will embolden the witch within to unveil and connect with the ancient magicks, channel them, and work with them in a way that peace and magnificent change and manifestation.
Although powerful, this talisman is not heavy or overbearing. If I were to sum up its energy I one word I would say: ‘love’. Even the colors encourage gentle care. Lavender to heal and calm. Lightening blue to awaken and charge. Gold to enrich and heal. Green to love and be loved. You will be wrapped in sky and lifted to the stars as your Third-Eye and Throat Chakra open and heal. Feel the truth, serenity, harmony, and feminie magicks carry you as you walk between worlds and shimmer through the dreaming.
And all of this magick is framed in the lusciousness of an Art Nouveau design.
Let your High Priestess rise and run wild under the protection of this stunning amulet. To see more click here.
Magick, magick, magick. It has been hard to keep up with writing blog posts while traveling. I’ve been very busy which has left me exhausted in the best possible way.
As always, America has welcomed me with open arms. Although my heritage is largely European I have always felt my home and heartlands are America and Canada. My health is better when I am here, all my best friends live here, and my magick seems to be stronger when I am walking this soil. My dreams sing with prophesy, my skin hums with life, my hands glimmer and glint with magick, and my feet move like fluid roots through the soft wild soils. I feel safe, loved, and happy here. There’s no real logical explanation, I just know that when I am here, I am home. The earth holds me, the trees shelter me, the winds whisper secret wisdoms and stories, and the waters… the waters nourish and cleanse me beyond anything I have experienced. And don’t even start me on the animals… Oh! And the skies in Oklahoma are phenomenal. The low lying trees and spread of single story buildings means it feels like you are living in the sky with the taste of clouds on your tongue and stars in your hair. It is freeing.
Every time I visit American and Canada I die and am reborn. It’s lovely.
Last week I spent time in San Diego with a dear friend. My love for her transcends everything. The memories I made with her are my greatest treasure. But they are just for me, my secret everything. I will be returning to her time and time again.
I will spend the next two weeks with my soul-mate Pearl Whitecrow. There are no words for what it has been like to physically meet Pearl. Pearl and I have been friends for several years. It was love at first pun. Our souls have entwined via words and dreams in ways that are eerily and beautifully inexplicable. When we connect our words become alchemical and a whole world of magick opens between us… and quite a bit of mischief. Last year we decided to start Weaver Tarot so we could share our magick, art, and mischief with the world. Weaver Tarot is less about making money and more about sharing and discovering new wisdoms. We want to keep the magick alive and support any and all witches that may need us.
I am not going to lie, throwing myself on a plane to travel across the world to meet and stay with people I’ve never ‘met’, especially when I am terminal and live in constant pain, is fucking terrifying. But it turns out the risk has paid off.
When Pearl and I met we both tripped out. It was as if we had both dropped LSD. We were flying, lifted out of our bodies and high on love and wonder. It took about three days for us to adjust to the fact we were both real, physically together, and that the love and connection was even stronger in real life. The connection was so seamless that we have been able to chat like old friends, work magick together like wedded crones, and create art and share a studio like we are simply two parts of a whole moving together. It has been wild and we have been trying to share our journey as best we can on Instagram, Facebook book and alike simply because we know the power of community. Plus, I love playing with visuals and chatting with people around the world. Social media can be a powerful tool for good.
So, even though my blog may be a bit quieter than usual the magick, business, and adventures continue to gather momentum and spiral out in long arms of possibilities, awe, creativity, love, and healing.
There will be some exciting changes coming to Weaver Tarot over the coming months as Pearl and I integrate our knowledge. Most of these will be kept secret until we can confirm times, places, dates, and other practicalities. In the meantime, phone readings and spiritual counseling listings will be advertised over the next few days. You will also see a lot of art and jewellery being added to the store. In time we may be open to commissions for talismans and alike, too. The little seed that was Weaver Tarot is surely blooming. Meanwhile, I am going to sink back down into the earth and bask in her warmth and spend time loving on my loved ones.
In two weeks’ time I will be leaving Oklahoma, I can barely think about leaving Pearl without wanting to cry but I know we will be reunited again very soon. On the flip side, in two weeks’ time I will be going to visit another soul-mate of mine, my co-author Leon Howell – another person with whom magick and love abounds in ways that defies description.
This trip is truly a great privilege and all this love is even a greater privilege, and none of it would have been possible without you because it was Weaver Tarot that helped fund this trip. So, thank you to all of those people who believed in us and our vision. Whether you spent money or simply offered us encouragement you have our deepest gratitude and we can only hope that over time Weaver Tarot can grow and serve you in the best way possible or at least bring you some joy from all the crazy adventures it births.
Love and blessings and mischief,